Sunday, December 18, 2011

Guest Blog: Keeping The Sex Simplistik, Yet Sizzling By Lila Munro

I’ve had quite a busy last couple of months with the whirlwind blog tour I’ve been on in celebration of the release of Three for Keeps. With that whirlwind tour has come the need for more and more blog topics. Well, who that reads romance doesn’t like to talk about sex . . .

I read a tremendous amount. In fact, I’m a Kindle junkie, downloading at least twenty selections a month, often times many, many more. I chalk it up to research when the bills come due to try to justify my addiction. And isn’t that one of the signs of an addiction? The justification of one’s actions?

With all this reading comes the realization that many times I’m disappointed with the sex in all these fine works I spend my hard earned dollars on. So many times the sex is cookie cutter and boring. I mean let’s face it. It takes a degree of creativity to keep our characters’ sex lives spicy and fun. How many ways can tab A fit into slot B anyway? Right? And in the case of ménage there are only so many slot Bs to contain the tab As. Most of the time you get the standard positions.

With the case of ménage a trois it’s basically one M in back, one M in front—the F is in the middle. Or, one F on face, one F on groin. Yep that about sums that scenario up. In the case of ménage a quatre—things tend to get a bit more complicated, and messy, but a writer can still fall into cookie cutter territory if not careful and the sex turns into sex that could be in any romance novel anywhere by anyone.

So, how does one keep it creative and outside the box? I can only speak for me, so here’s how I do it . . .

Most my characters have a bit of exhibitionist in them to a degree. What does that mean exactly? Well, my characters may be in any standard position, but it’s where they are in said position that keeps things lively. For instance, I’ve had two characters do the nasty in a dressing room standing up, another couple did it on a motorcycle while it was running, and yet another couple on the patio of a club. Places where anyone could have come along and watched what they were doing. Risqué, non? Sometimes place can change the perspective of the sex as much as a position switch. All of these characters were in straight, pretty vanilla, relationships where they utilized pretty standard positions. It was where they were doing the deed that kept their sex life alive and interesting.

So, what about my kinkier couples? How do I keep the kink kinky? I love writing kink by the way. I love sub-cultures, and although I won’t reveal all my sources I have a good bead on information concerning the lifestyle. I like to write it because I want it written well. These couples that engage in said lifestyle are not acrobats or made of rubber. They are normal run of the mill folk that simply like things a bit hotter than the normal vanilla couple.

Okay, back to how I keep these less than vanilla couples engaging to my readers. I have to stretch my brain that’s for sure. I try to keep in mind fantasies that might be going through their minds and try to fulfill them in a tasteful way. Anyone can put Chloe on a cross, or strap Sammi to a spanking bench. These are the cookie cutter “positions” if you will of the BDSM world—how to avoid that . . . Fantasies.

In Identity Crisis, the first book in that series, I make Tori’s greatest fantasy come true with two masked men neither of whom she knew the identity of. Was it a logistical nightmare? Yes, but it was fun and fresh and so not cookie cutter. Sub-space fascinates me. If I take a submissive there in a book, I more than take he or she there. They go there with a purpose beyond the sexual release. In the second Identity book, Master Steph takes his sub so far under she would have given up national secrets. Of course he was only fishing for one medium bit of information, which she freely gives up at that point. Fun right? I thought so.

Three for Keeps was definitely my greatest challenge insofar as keeping the sex rockin’. I mean there’s a lot of multiple partner sex written out there. How could I make this different and fresh? I won’t give away all my secrets, you’ll have to read it to find all of the dirt, but I can share this much . . . one of the scenes involves water as our heroine, Zoey Matthews, had a near drowning experience at a very young age. I innovated, kept the sex interesting, and solved one of her issues all in the same crack of the whip—pun intended . . .

Synopsis: Zoey Matthews is in love. She’s been in love since the day she was dropped off by a social worker at yet another foster home on a back country road miles from nowhere, Missouri. At age ten, she met the men of her dreams. Over the course of sixteen years, Dane Cardwell, Jack Devereux and Ryan Wilkins fell in love with her, too. They’ve each told her they love her, they’ve shown her and each man has gone so far as to ask her to marry him. But what they don’t know is Zoey loves them all.

Her game of kiss and not tell all comes crashing down around her the night of her graduation from veterinary school and Zoey runs for the mountains. Of Colorado. Hoping to outrun her obsession with three men and forget them all together, she stays gone for ten years. But the wound has never healed. In fact, it's done nothing but fester. Needing to clear the air, Zoey agrees to spend a few days back home with the boys never imagining it would turn into a week filled with comparison sex as Dane, Jack and Ryan each try to get Zoey to choose between them and their varied tastes.

When she finally tells the truth, a truth only one of them has known all along, Zoey fears the foursome will never be able to make a sharing relationship work. After all, aren't there just too many personalities and desires to sort through? Add in the kink factor and things get really complicated. Zoey’s not convinced the truth has any merit, but there's one thing she knows for sure…this time she's playing for keeps.

About The Author:

Lila Munro pens contemporary erotic romance and currently resides on the coast of North Carolina. She is a military wife and takes much of her inspiration for her heroes from the marines she’s lived around for the past fifteen years. Coining the term realmantica, she strives to produce quality romance in a realistic setting. When she’s not writing, she enjoys reading everything she can get her hands on, trips to the museum and aquarium, taking field research trips, and soaking up the sun on the nearby beaches.

Her works include The Executive Officer’s Wife, Bound By Trust, Destiny’s Fire, A Slower Lower Love, A Slower Lower Life, Salvation, Force Recon: Beacon Bayou, Force Recon: Somalia, True Identity and Identity Crisis. Currently she’s working on sequels to several series to be released throughout 2011-2012.

She’s a member in good standing with the RWA and Passionate Ink. Ms. Munro is also the Vice President of Business Affairs at Rebel Ink Press. She loves to hear from her readers and can be contacted via her website, or through Facebook at You can also contact her via email at For more information about Rebel Ink Press please visit their website at


  1. Really enjoyed your post and a great topic. It's a question I've pondered myself, how many sex scenes can I write without them all being the same? I thought it was only my insecurities that brought such wonder, but I guess I'm not alone. Your insight is very helpful.

  2. Glad it was helpful. :) I spend a great deal of time pondering such things...

  3. Hi LizzieBeth...thanks! So glad you stopped by and found it so. :)